There is that notion that everyone has seen 'repeating the same actions and expecting different results is the definition of insanity'. I have to say that I couldn't agree more. Some recent events in my life have shown me some pretty strong examples of people acting absolutely insane.
There was a heavy conversation about honesty and people revealing who they truly are. Although I am not a huge Oprah fan (her being a pagan definitely stepped her up a bit in my opinion though) there was a quote from her show that caught me one day while we were at the laundromat washing the comforters. The quote - when some one reveals themselves to you, believe them the first time. Pretty sage advice. The problem with that is so many people conceal who they are that it is hard to know what they are representing as themselves and what is truly genuine. Deciphering the difference is a daunting and difficult task when people do not chose to be truthful and honest about who they are.
We all want people to see us at our best. Maybe it is a matter of emulating what we would like to be, maybe it is purely deceit for gains. No matter the reason, misrepresentation ultimately will lead to hurt and disappointment. If any of us think that we are perfect, without flaw or blameless then that is nothing more that arrogant ignorance and denial. It isn't that we should air our dirty laundry publicly or drag our emotional baggage around in some fancy LV case that screams, 'Look at what I have went through' but being open with people who you are at your core. It shouldn't be scary to be real, even if you have messed up in your life because those mess ups should lead us to better actions the next time (unless you are one of those insane people)
That leads me to redemption. I truly, truly believe (perhaps foolishly) that we are all capable of amending our wrongs and correcting things in our lives that aren't worth repeating. Everyone should be offered a second chance (or however many it takes) to change, to be a better person. That shouldn't have to come at your own personal expense though. Sometimes people have to move on to a different circumstance to be able to change. Behaviors and emotions can become very much like an addiction if we allow them to. Some people are so 'hooked' on bitterness, anger, pity or other destructive emotions that they need a whole new environment to change. The same goes behaviors - if you are a horrible gossip then you must get out of the circle of friends that allowed you (enabled) or encouraged that behavior. Isn't this the same way an addict has to act?
One more tangent of thought for this, as it was brought up last night. Pointing out someone else's wrong, when you exude similar behavior or actions does not make you better than them. Self-righteous actions or words do not make you righteous. You can't ask someone to try to change if you are in some way encouraging that behavior or other bad behaviors by exhibiting your own. Ex: If you are looking to help someone with a pill addiction, you can't go out drinking with that person. That sets a terrible example. Do not criticize the same behavior that you are doing - that makes you nothing more than a hypocrite. See also insanity.
Being genuine is not the easiest task. Revealing yourself doesn't mean exposing yourself to everyone, rather that you must choose carefully who has earned the right to be trustworthy. Choose your words, responses, company and thoughts carefully - they will have a lasting impact. It is hard to walk the road of redemption, not knowing who is there to help and who is there to kick some dirt in your face, just to blind you long enough to keep you off course. If someone wants to show themselves as something different than you originally saw, take time to examine their motives instead of acting rashly. Please remember, your truth is not always the same as another's and they have every right to explain and amend if they so choose. Be good to each other without being false or insanity will surely ensue.
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